stress levels risen....

i have nothing to say to anyone right now. i knw in my heart what i feel and why i do the things i do. i hate myself for believein you tonight, even hurt worse when u didnt even try and defend me but then if thats what u did then it would have proved her right which u didnt want to happen. but my god letting her say all of that shit in front of our son....like seriously what am i supposed to think. Then i get home and have to listen to the rents spiel about you and me and how i need to get you out of my head and how i need to date a hockey player....ughh who cares as long as i am having a good time and not caught up in it what difference does it make? honestly/